10/6/08

A Moment with Asher

I pick him up from his crib and he says "Hi," dragging this one beautiful word out with a tender tinge of baby-talk sweetness. He puts those chubby little arms around my shoulders and he squeezes. We breathe each other in. Then he lets go, tilting his head back to look at me, as if he's checking to see if I'm the same. His Mama. And I answer "Hi, sweet baby, how are you?"

He chuckles a deep, throaty little chuckle, and smiles into my eyes.

I feel as if my heart might burst with love. Surely it could.

But instead, he rears back and BAM, head-butts me square in the nose.

I nearly drop him as the pain screams through my face, racing under my eyes and ringing in my ears. I set him down on the floor and check for blood. I'm shocked! There's no blood. But oh holy cats, it hurts!

I look down at the culprit, his big bald head gleaming atop that round face with those big, sparkly blue eyes and that button nose. He lets out another throaty laugh. Then suddenly, he moves on, distracted by a tiny dust bunny slowly rolling past his pudgy little toes. He has one finger in his mouth, while drooling out of the corner of that tiny little mouth.

He's making it really hard to be mad at him, down there on the floor, all wrapped up in his adorableness.

But he looks quite proud of himself. So I know this is a teaching moment, and I put on my thinking cap. You have to keep going through the pain, people. If you're going to be an effective parent, you simply must soldier on.

I pick him up and say, "Asher, be gentle to Mama." Then I gingerly turn my head toward his and bonk him ever so lightly. We bang our heads together gently several times as I repeat, "See, this is how we bump heads," in a gentle, hushed tone.

He peeks at me out of the corner of his eye. Yes, the look he gives me seems to say, "I understand the lesson, dear Mother."

(I can tell by the little smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.)

If he could speak English, he would add, "I understand, Mother. I understand. I will never try to break your nose again."

Yes. I am a brilliant teacher. An excellent parent. All in a day's work, people. All in a day's work.

Now excuse me, I need to go ice my nose.
update: my nose is fine, really! You all are too kind in the comments. I'm being dramatic on purpose in this post. I have a strange sense of humor. I really don't mean it when I say that stuff about "a lesson in excellent parenting." I promise I'm not the most arrogant person on the planet, I'm just making fun of the situation. Maybe you knew this, so I'll stop explaining now :) But thanks for all the compliments on my parenting skills anyway!

26 clicked right here to comment:

LisAway said...

Hilarious! I was feeling all warm and fuzzy reading about your morning bonding. And then came the BURST of laughter. (I'm sorry about your nose, though. Definitely been there before, although I never thought to teach my kids about the appropriate way to bonk heads. You're SUCH a good mother!)

JustRandi said...

Oh, OW! I've actually dropped children from the shock of the pain they've caused. I remember one daughter who bit me on the lip.

I'm so glad you're ok. Well, both of you!

And you're right, he's much too cute to stay mad at!

Abra said...

see, at least when they have hair, it kinda cushions a little...

Kazzy said...

OOoooo that hurts so bad! I wonder if anyone makes Mommy Helmets? I remember those days! At least they love you no matter what and snuggle and kiss you and ..... sigh...my kids are getting older...

a Tonggu Momma said...

Heather ~ As the momma of a sensory-seeker, I am oh-so-familiar with that sensation. Hope it was a large ice pack!

Jessica said...

that is so funny! what a beautiful moment, and then impact!

Ewelina said...

I was kneeling when Aaron was running to me. Then I held my arms out to hug him. When he was close enough to hug me instead of that he BONKed me in the nose! Boy did that hurt!!! Then I picked him up and ran up steirs and said to mom -Take him,
quickly quickly!!-.I told mom what happened. Then she told me to"look at this post". So I know how you feel. Ouch.

Kelly @ Love Well said...

Oh yes. I know this pain.

So does Teyla. Because she has an older brother.

Poor baby.

Peanut said...

Ooohhh ouch! Mine's a head-bonker too!
I love the sweet greetings first thing in the morning (well, ok... when I'm not too grumpy about being awake already!)

Sara@ Butterville said...

We do "bumps" too. My mom started it with the kids. I wasn't a fan at first, thinking it would lead to bloody noses. But it has always been a gentle love bump. I don't know how she did it. But it sounds like you got it right!

Baby Tunnel Exodus said...

My favorite part of the movie Pearl Harbor is when Ben Affleck is opening the champagne and the cork bops him in his (already broken) nose and he says, "It hurts. It hurts sompen fierce."

BEEN THERE. Way to turn it into a teachable moment; for Asher and all of us. Blessings, Whitney

Melanie J said...

I let the baby sleep with me in the wee hours of the morning today, which he never gets to do, because he was teething and miserable. As he snuggled into my body heat, he settled down, drowsed off and it was so sweet. I wondered why we don't do that more often. Then he kicked me in the face and I remembered.

Erin said...

I've experienced this before. It takes all I can muster to not drop them, yell at them, or send them to their room. I'm impressed with how you handled it!

Becky said...

This happened to me yesterday. Twice. Only I didn't handle it as well as you did. Maybe because I think a four-year old should darn well know better. My response was, "What is wrong with you? Stop doing that!"

Yeah, it's been a long weekend.

Kristina P. said...

My head hurt just reading that! You are an amazing storyteller.

Eowyn said...

I cannot tell you how often my kids have bonked my nose just like that. It hurts so bad.

Goodonya for finding a good way to teach him.

*MARY* said...

ouch, I can't believe how calmly you handled this. There's always yelling when stuff like this happens to me.

RosyRose said...

Don't you hate when your kid brings involuntary tears to your eyes. Like the ultimate guilt trip "I made my mom cry"!
I feel your pain...yeah, one too many times!
Love your blog...I sneaked in from life in the parsonage! I'm Rose, I'm a newbe. So Nice to meet you!

Marivic_Little GrumpyAngel said...

I get sympathetic pains so OUCHIE!!!! But so easy to get through the pain when inflicted by such cuteness. Just keep this in mind when he's a teen-ager as there will be more symbolic head banging :-) Glad you're okay. You're a good, patient Momma.

Jillene said...

I have been head butted many a time!! I was also kicked once in the nose/cheek and it got really swollen and bruised and looked like I had been in a bar brawl!!

fiveflowers said...

Sounds like my guy! Except he is 2.5 and he just gets so frustrated! Here's to a speedy recovery!

MommyTime said...

OUCH! That happened to me once on the eyebrow, and I couldn't bear to touch it for weeks afterwards. I'm glad your nose is okay. And it sounds like you did a good job helping him figure out some limits too. Excellent mama!

radioactive girl said...

I completely know that head butted feeling of pain. It has happened to me with each of my kids and I handled it the same way. But who ever would have thought it would hurt so much!

Huse Yo Mama said...

First of all, this post is hilarious. Painful and hilarious.

Secondly, thanks for stopping by my blog and adding me to your list, despite your best efforts to keep your blogroll at a manageable level! I, too, am in the same spot and you have me hooked. So, thanks.

Kimberly said...

I've had that happen! Good for you for seizing hold of the moment and using it to teach!

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

Oh gosh, Heather! Those head-butts are the kiss of death. They can do damage. Glad you've recovered. :)

Related Posts with Thumbnails
 

Blog Designed by: NW Designs