10/10/08

Tattle Tale

Dear Daddy,
Remember those boxers you wanted Mommy
to return while you were out of town for work? You know.
The ones you bought last week?
Remember? You had accidentally grabbed the wrong package?
Well um...I think the package may be a bit ripped.
And maybe possibly, um...gone.

OOPS, I accidentally did that. I don't know if Target will take them now. Guess what, Daddy? Mom wasn't watching me. She was on the computer. Again.
Also, I don't know that Mommy can be trusted at all as a single parent
while you're out of town, working hard for the money.
Asher eats tin foil. He doesn't like it.

Come home soon,
Miles

P.S. Guess what else, Daddy? You know how mommy thinks it's really smart to hang the bag of dirty diapers outside over the fence so they don't stink up the house? Yeah, well the dog got the bag off the fence and she ripped up all the dirty diapers all over the junkyard...I mean, what's it called? Oh, the backyard. Yeah, she did. Mommy said she's leaving them there for you to clean up when you get home.

We miss you!

25 clicked right here to comment:

Kelly @ Love Well said...

I'm laughing so hard right now, I can't think of a comment.

Single parenthood STINKS. But probably not as much as your backyard right now, especially since the sun just came out again.

minnesotamom said...

Heather, SO funny! Those computers...they are like a vortex...

I should try putting the diapers out on our deck and see what the neighbors think of it (we live in a townhome).

Becky said...

On the days I do laundry and go to preschool and cook a good dinner, I have no problem telling Adam what we did that day.

I was never sure what to tell him on the days nobody is dressed before noon and we all have mac and cheese for breakfast. And lunch.

I guess next time, I'll let the kids explain it. It's so much cuter coming from them... :)

Debbie said...

Do you guess every family photo album has pictures of kids with their dad's boxers around their necks? Mine sure do.

Kazzy said...

My gag reflex is kicking in because we have had the dog/dirty diaper liason happen before and I almost lost it! I t surely is hard to blog and watch the kids at the same time. My kids are just lucky that this trend didn't start until my youngest was ten! Hang in there Miles and Asher!

Kristina P. said...

Well, I guess foil is better than poop. Maybe.

Sara@ Butterville said...

Oh no! I'm so sorry but I'm laughing at you. This is just too...well laughable. And the more I think about your yard the harder I laugh. I'm sorry. What was he thinking leaving you alone?

Not the Norm said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Not the Norm said...

That is so HILARIOUS. I laughed so hard.

I feel bad for your husband...maybe.

Abra said...

Too Funny Heather!

Lara said...

Well, at least you're making me feel like a better mother! But only a little.

Stuff like this happens constantly at my house, in fact, just today I found my 2 year old sitting in the fridge, eating all the cookie dough.

prairiemama said...

Ok seriously, i may have just wet myself. That is hilarious! It's not easy being a single parent is it? I'm glad I don't have to do it very often.

Jillene said...

Hahahahahahahaha!!!! That is HILARIOUS!! Kind of like the time my son got in the fridge (this was while I was in the shower) and poured out an entire gallon of milk and cracked/crushed 1 dozen eggs to go along with it!!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Riotous!!! And I am flying solo for the week as well. Wanna catch a plane and come over? We can let the kiddos destroy my house while we chat over coffee.

charrette said...

Hahahaha! LOVE the kid-tattling thing. I love the diaper part best of all, because I, too, had that bright idea...and our dog ripped it apart, too!

Being a single parent is brutal.
But I'm convinced all single moms are going straight to heaven. Even the ones whose husbands do come home occasionally. :)

The Three 22nds said...

Thanks for the laugh! Super funny. I LOVE how much my life sounds like your life.

Betty said...

That's classic! Oh the glamorous life of a stay-at-home mommy. Too Cute!!! My boys have grown from that stage and I actually miss it!!
Very Funny!

Bonnie Lewis said...

oh my gosh that is HILARIOUS!!!!! bless your heart!

Melanie J said...

Reason 1,034 that I will not get a dog. They are way harder than kids!

Baby Tunnel Exodus said...

Do those pictures say prom night to anyone but me? Adorable! Along those lines, I saw an adorable Halloween costume a few years back, a basket with a hole cut in it for legs, held up with suspenders and filled up with 1 child and lots of clean socks and underwear... voila - Laundry. :o) Blessings, Whitney

LisAway said...

This is hilarious. Good thing you didn't have to tell him all those things!

*MARY* said...

I hope daddy doesn't read this, he might not come home if there's a yard of smelly poop waiting for him.

Jessica said...

SO cute! I'm a solo mom right now too. .. you have to laugh or you'll cry!

radioactive girl said...

We used to have a dog when my oldest was a baby and I had the same thing happen. Yuck!

Heidi Ashworth said...

This is a total crack up and you can bet the bathwater that these kinds of things happened to moms before computers were invented~!

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