1/13/10

Light

Wednesday~January 13, 2010

He comes in the door and his face is red from working all day in the Minnesota cold. He looks so tired.

He says he loves the smell in here and I'm all proud because I've been working on his favorite, Mexican. Cilantro and garlic are mixing through the air when I look at him, hoping my meal is spicy enough. He likes spicy to the point of sweating the very most.

I fumble around the kitchen, stirring and flipping tortillas and asking him questions. He peels off layers of winter weather wear and he sits down with a thud, like it's all he's wanted to do all day.

Instead, he's been lifting and bending and pounding nails and building. Miles wants him to build with Legos now and he just can't.

There's just been too much building. Since 1970-something...building.

He's built innumerable houses and our lives. That's what he's done.

Asher asks him for gum and we laugh because Asher always asks him for gum first, after saying Bapa over and over. His Bapa is one of his favorites.

Miles says that's because Asher and Bapa share a name. Asher Michael. Michael.

He wants to know about conversations I've had and he is the one who called me on my way home from Cupcake '10. He called and asked questions and I know he was mostly just trying to be sure I'd stay awake through the long drive home.

He's my Dad. He's Bapa.

He's interested and I think that makes all the difference. His questions are specific, of things he remembers me mentioning in passing or learned from my blog. Yes, he probably knows more about the subculture of blogging than most people his same age and in his same shoes. Because somehow he's proud of me for my words and my meal cooking skills and maybe even my mothering. That blows my mind.

So when I'm confused about this move we've made and I feel lonely for our last home and its people, it makes me feel a whole lot better to see him come through the door, snowy boots kicking the floor.

I still can't figure out which light switch turns on what light, or how to get the house to heat evenly, but my parents are nearby and so is my sister and her family and so we're home.

37 clicked right here to comment:

Mommy Mo said...

Love this post. I'm kinda choked up.

Amber@theRunaMuck said...

"He's interested and I think that makes all the difference."

Isn't that true about all people who are different than we, but still love us so.

I miss my Daddy, and I've gone back and forth - what I would give to be near him, what I would give up to be near him.

THis is a really good post.

Mrs. Cox said...

Beautiful. Can't wait to see your place sometime.

Kim said...

Beautiful Heather, just like you.

Gracey said...

This post was very sweet and moving.

Tessa said...

Oh how I miss my family (who all happen to live in Minnesota) and long for the ability to have them so close. Maybe someday....
Enjoy!

jen said...

we, too, live near our boppa. my dad.
who routinely emails me to say something little like he's proud of the initials after my name. or that i'm good at being a mom AND having a job.
and it's exactly the reason that i will NEVER move away from here. because my kids have him too.
i'm glad you finally have that. it's amazingly wonderful ... even if i never did get a chance to meet you when you were here.

This Heavenly Life said...

Welcome home Heather! Enjoy your (whole) family :)

Geezees Custom Canvas Art said...

This post is so beautiful it made me cry!

The Legers said...

That's a great little story about your dad. You're very lucky!

Elizabeth @claritychaos said...

How did we not get a chance to talk about our dads together? I moved back to Wisco in part to be nearer to my parents. My dad works out in the Wisconsin cold, fixing cars like he has for the last 45 years.

He reads my blog religiously, even telling me that he's enjoyed getting to know me better through my writing.

(How did I just make this about me?) I'm just seeing yet another layer that explains why you and I click like we do.

xo elizabeth

Kristina P. said...

Your dad sounds so cute!

LunaMoonbeam said...

Beautiful, fabulous! I'm so happy for you.

Keyona said...

That just made my heart smile. I'm glad you are home. Hey and I've been away and sure did miss you. I'm back now. :o)

Annette Lyon said...

Having been away from my parents and just recently reconnected, this spoke to me. I'm constantly surprised to find out how much they know because--wow!--they DO read my blog!

And now you've got me tearing up.

Ash said...

I talk to my mom on the phone every other day or so, which is lovely, but it's the e-mails my Dad sends that I keep.

You're a lucky girl.

Deb said...

let me give you some perspective on this (not that you need any, because obviously you understand the treasure you have)...

this is the post that people like me read and just feel sad and jealous (but in a good way, if that makes ANY sense). it's what i wish i had, and what i insist on creating for my kids' kids (if my boys stay out of jail long enough to procreate).

you have absolutely everything you need. you're lucky, goose.

Jamie said...

Your dad sounds like a real treasure. How special that you get to live close by.

*Lissa* said...

I love this so much. I consider my Dad one of my very best friends.

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

I'm so glad for the sweetness that makes up for the sorrow. And I'm suddenly missing my dad...

Unknown said...

Beautiful! I live right around the corner from my parents and my husbands live about 12 min. away. My brother and his wife live around the other corner from us and my sister-in-law and her family live just up the road. I love having family close by!

Mama-Face said...

Somehow he's proud of you? OH sweetie. He'd be proud of you no matter what and has every reason to be supremely proud of your blogging expertise. What a lovely man, your Bapa.

Did I miss Cupcake 2010 stories?...I've been gone...I must read backwards. :)

Mammatalk said...

Moving post. Nothing like family!

Traci Michele said...

WOW! You write so beautiful! Nice to meet you.

Hugs,
Traci

Lee said...

That was beautiful.

Anonymous said...

I'm very much a daddy's girl. Nothing feels as good as knowing he's near and he's proud of me. I'm glad you have that.

Corinne Cunningham said...

This makes me homesick for your dad :) Ha!
Lovely...

Jen said...

it is so very awesome to have family close by. I love having mine near.

Blessed said...

You writing about your Dad makes me think about my Dad and miss him so much, I talk to him on the phone almost every day... but that 1800 mile span between us, that really stinks. Our Dad's have what is the key to being an important part of our lives - they are interested, they care, they question, they love.

Nicole said...

that is a beautiful post about your dad:) its so nice when they are closeby!

Unknown said...

Lovely post. I love having my parents so close by too. Its the best!

Unknown said...

Oh Heather - I'm crying over here. Lucky you and lucky Bapa.

Amber Lynae said...

I'm glad that you get to be near family. I still love to sit next to my dad and cuddle. There is something so comforting about having him hold me.

Kelly @ Love Well said...

This made me tear-up.

I don't live near family, but in my opinion, this is the BEST reason to move. Family is an unspeakable gift. I know you will treasure it, Heather. (As will Miles and Asher.)

ChrisTomlinIsMyPretendBoyfriend said...

Heather, have I ever told you how much I like your dad? He's the kind of guy you can just sit in silence and be comfortable with it. I really like that.

Kelly Miller said...

This post really made me think. My father recently moved 5 minutes away from me after being absent most of my life. He says he finally had the nerve to come home. I wondered what home he thought he had. We're all trying to figure it out.

Reading about you and Bapa and family reminds me that once the threads are connected, you never know how they'll sustain you. Thanks for that.

kanishk said...

what I would give to be near him, what I would give up to be near him.

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