8/22/10

in our way


I'm sitting here with some acoustic folk. Not folk as in people, but with folk music, and I'm wondering about the lady that's crying in the next room with her friend, the one who is raising her crinkly brown napkin to the corners of her eyes to dab and sniff.

I can see her because of the french doors and their glass panes, ten of them.

I wonder why she's crying but I'm not going to listen. I could take off my headphones and listen, but I want to honor her story, her sense that it's hers and only shared with a friend, in their own space, in the coffee shop they share with me. A place that feels very safe.

And I wonder why so few people actually check on crying strangers when they're not with a friend, and if they do, is it because they really care or because they're curious and maybe feel a little obligated to let out an awkward, Are you okay?

Whatever our true intentions, pure or not, I think we should check on each other always, because it helps the one dabbing at their eyes with the hurting heart. Maybe we should just go, say something, anything. Maybe then, because of what comes of it, the healing and hope, we'll be living our way to the right motivations, the next time.

In so many things, we do our way to feeling
love's way, until we're through the things in our way.

--------

this was freely written in a random moment after hours of working on the book. therefore, it may make sense to only me.

Peace out.

19 clicked right here to comment:

sara said...

hmmmm.....since I was that one with tearful eyes several times this week, I think a hug never hurts and is always welcome....sometimes even from a stranger.

TKW said...

I remember once, my sophomore year in college, I was having such a hard time and suddenly started sobbing in the hallway of a very busy Student Union. I was humiliated to be doing so, but I just was overcome. A total stranger, a girl so beautiful that I don't believe she ever would have talked to me otherwise, stopped, dropped her books, and crouched down with me. For a half hour. She missed a class for a stranger who was scary unstable. I'll never forget it.

Allison @ Alli 'n Son said...

This is beautifully written. I think that random acts if kindness are so important, yet do hard to do sometimes. Maybe it's the fear of your kindness being rejected. Or of invading someones space when they only wanted a few moments to themselves. But still, it could just make someones day to have a stranger help or ask what's wrong.

Ann Imig said...

And I have been respecting your time with yourself.

But I miss you!

Hope the book is flowing freely. I bet it is.

Smooch,
Ann

Don Guitar said...

It's sometimes difficult to decide whether or not we should reach out to a stranger who appears to need help. I prefer to reach out, taking the chance they'll think I'm some sort of nut case because I've been in that horrible place that's one hug away from total chaos.

Carolyn...Online said...

Oh man. If you see me crying in public please pretend that you didn't notice so I can pretend that you didn't see me. I'm an ugly crier.

Bina said...

Oh I SO wrestle within when I see one crying, broken and hurting. Everything in me screams out to go over and check on them...so put my arms around them and offer them love, but I always hesitate as I don't know how they will react to a crazed redhead embracing them!!

Food for thought...

Corinne said...

I'm with Ann... I miss you :)

But this, this is why you are so good. The honoring of stories, and the checking in with those who you never know if they might need a shoulder. So you.

wendy said...

well, It makes sense to me too. I love this.
we should always take care of each other.
we all belong to each other in the great scheme of things I think

katdish said...

So, how are YOU doing my friend?

Angie said...

Makes perfect sense. Yes, we all need to be checked up on... to be cared for... to be loved. And we all need to be checking, caring and loving.

Such beautiful words.

So, just checking.. how ARE you? :)

Angie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kazzy said...

I checked on a crying person once and got my head bitten off. But I still do it. :)

Kelly said...

I don't inquire, but I will pass over a tissue. And then I'll pass respectfully on in peace and hopefulness.

Working on the book must be exciting but draining at the same time.

Janie said...

it made total sense to me. loved it! janie

kirsten said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kirsten said...

ah. I have a clear memory of weeping in the food court of a mall, maybe 3 years ago? I'd lost a bag of 3 brand new pairs of expensive kids shoes, and was just feeling stupid, poor, and well, tragical. A woman came up to me and said all the wrong things, and I remember being so annoyed at the time, thinking "let me cry in peace woman!"

but only now, with a little hindsight can I see what a generous act it was on her part, even if they weren't the things I wanted to hear.

As usual, I can see both sides, agree with both sides, and remain confused by life. ;)

Great post Heather. Glad to hear you're writing.

Heather said...

You have such a good heart.

((hugs))

From Tracie said...

I have had a stranger check on me while crying in a store once. It was very sweet and much appreciated!

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