TWO-LEGGED, RED-BANDED TODDLER

"MOMMY, I PUT A RUBBER BAND ON MY HEAD!!!"
"OKAY, BUT DON'T DO THAT AGAIN, IT COULD GO IN YOUR EYE."

"WHY?"

"IT JUST CAN."

"BUT WHY?"

"MOM, I'M A BASEBALL HAT ROCK STAR."

"YES, YOU ARE!"